Top Ten Strategies for Women to Manage Money Post-Divorce

Whether your divorce is behind you or you’re still in the messy middle, I’m glad you’re here and interested in making sure that you make the best decisions possible about your financial future.

Being financially sound as a woman is already a challenge, but factor in the impacts of divorce and the picture becomes even murkier.

"Nearly 50% of women experience a substantial decrease in their living standards post-divorce, according to the U.S. Government Accountability Office. This stark reality underscores the necessity for strategic financial planning to reclaim and secure their financial future."

That’s a pretty grim statistic. And in total transparency, there are studies saying the number is higher and studies saying the number is lower. But I could find absolutely no studies that show men take a financial hit after divorce.

If you’re anything like me (and almost every divorced woman I coach), you know this is true…because you’ve experienced it. It’s not news to you that the stress of financial insecurity is real and can be paralyzing.

For me, I could not begin to heal from my divorce while my brain was on high alert all the time worrying about money. I was afraid to open my bills. I never looked at my bank accounts, and I certainly didn’t have a plan for where I wanted to spend my money.

I read books on personal finance, listened to hours of podcasts, and talked to anyone I knew who could teach me about managing my money. I learned a lot, but the most important thing I learned is, Money is not hard.

I don’t know why women have been led to believe that money is too complicated for us or money is something that we don’t have to pay attention to. (Oh, actually, I do know why we’re told that, but that’s a rant for another day).😉

That’s why these strategies are broken up into 2 segments: the first 5 strategies are focused on getting you into the right headspace so you actually take action on the second 5 strategies.

Mindset Strategies to Uplevel Your Relationship With Your Money

1. Flip the switch on how you think about money. It’s impossible to manage your money if your belief is that money is hard and money is for other people and not you. In every aspect of life, you can’t be your own worst enemy and still get where you want to be - this is especially true with money. One of the biggest reasons women shy away from building their wealth is due to the fear and anxiety associated with it. Since money feels tricky to understand and painful to lose, you may tend to avoid even looking at your bank balance or checking your credit reports.
2. Forgive your past actions. It doesn’t matter what you’ve done with your money in the past. It’s important to have compassion for the woman you were then - she was doing the best she could with the information she had at the time. Self-forgiveness and self-compassion are essential ingredients to success with your money.
3. Believe in your inherent worthiness. After divorce, your self-esteem might be at an all-time low. But you are a strong, amazing woman and worthy of everything you crave in life. You don’t have to earn the right to happiness OR money. You are more than deserving exactly as you are right now.
4. Appreciate where you are. It’s true, gratitude helps reinforce a feeling of contentment. To create a positive wealth mindset, it’s important to continuously be mindful of what you have – this means being thankful for the money you have right now - even if it’s not as much as you want, even if you aren’t quite sure what you want to do with it, even if you don’t know how to make it grow. Love every penny you have 🤑.
5. Find your squad. Divorce is hard and you need a community more than ever. Surround yourself with people who share your vision for living a positive and successful life. You don’t need people around you who want you to play small. They may think they have your best interests at heart, but you don’t need that energy. Especially when you’re focused on growth. In my house we called these people ‘bubble bursters’ and their influence can be sneakily toxic. You want people that believe all your dreams are possible - maybe even before you believe in them.

Once you’re comfortable with the idea that you are worthy of money, it’s time to get into the practical strategies - I like to think of this as the action phase.

Take Action Strategies to Transform Your Relationship With Your Money

1. Know what you’re working with. First things first, get a clear picture of your financial situation. This is an important post-divorce step to take. You want to make sure you understand what money you were supposed to get - and confirm that you got it all! Gather all your financial documents, log into your bank accounts, and list out your assets (what you own) and liabilities (what you owe). This step might feel daunting, but knowledge is power. Once you know where you stand, you can start making informed decisions about where to go from here.
2. Boost your financial IQ. Money may have seemed like a foreign language in the past, but it’s time to become fluent. Educate yourself about personal finance through books, podcasts, and online courses. Understanding concepts like budgeting, investing, and saving for retirement can demystify money and make you feel more confident in handling your finances. Start small, and build your knowledge over time.
3. Spend in line with your values and pay yourself first. Your spending should reflect what truly matters to you. Identify your core values, and make sure your expenses align with them. Additionally, prioritize saving by paying yourself first. This means setting aside a portion of your income for savings before you tackle other expenses. It can be as simple as setting up an automatic transfer to your savings account each month.
4. Make it easy and automatic. Simplify your financial life. You don’t need numerous accounts and credit cards. If I could only give one piece of advice to my past self, it would be Automate, Automate, Automate. Set up automatic transfers to your savings and retirement accounts. Automating these processes not only saves you time but also ensures consistency in your financial habits. It’s one less thing to worry about, and you’ll be building wealth effortlessly.
5. Track and tweak. Regularly monitor your financial progress. Use apps or spreadsheets to track your income and expenses. Reviewing your financial situation monthly helps you stay on top of your goals and make adjustments as needed. If something isn’t working, don’t be afraid to tweak your approach. Flexibility is key to long-term success.

Congratulations on taking the first steps toward transforming your financial future! Remember, navigating finances after a divorce is a journey, not a race. Every small step you take, whether it's flipping the switch on how you think about money or automating your savings, brings you closer to financial independence and peace of mind.

Managing your money post-divorce doesn’t have to be overwhelming. Take it step by step, and don’t be afraid to ask for help.

Empower yourself with knowledge, surround yourself with supportive people, and celebrate your progress along the way. You are more than capable of building a secure and prosperous future. Embrace these strategies with confidence and watch your relationship with money—and your life—flourish.

Here's to your financial freedom and the incredible journey ahead. You've got this! 🚀

If you are ready to take action on your own personal finances, click here to learn more about our personal finance program, Good Morning Moneymaker. You can feel better about your money by the end of today.