Words of Encouragement for a Woman Going Through Divorce

Divorce is never easy, and as a woman navigating through this challenging journey, it's normal to feel overwhelmed, confused, and even fearful about what lies ahead. However, it's important to remember that you are not alone, and there is hope for a brighter future beyond this difficult time. As a woman who has been through divorce myself, I understand the emotional rollercoaster you may be experiencing. 

Let me start by telling you what I wish someone who had survived their own divorce had told me - you will get through this. 

You will be stronger and know yourself better after the worst of it is over. 

Here are some other things I wish another divorced woman had shared with me during my separation and divorce.  Hopefully, you will find encouragement to comfort you and keep you going through this challenging period of transition:

You Are Resilient 

Despite the pain and uncertainty you may be experiencing right now, remember that you have overcome challenges in the past, and you will overcome this one too. You are stronger and more resilient than you realize. I look back on how resilient I had to be and feel crazy proud of myself.  It was hard. And I got through it. I wasn’t always graceful. And there were days when I was so freaking exhausted I wanted to give up.  But I didn’t. And you won’t either.  

You Are Not Alone 

While divorce can feel isolating, know that you are not alone in this journey. Remember that over 50% of marriages end in divorce which means you are not the first women to experience the heartbreak, frustration and fear that comes along with this decision. They survived and many of them are thriving. You will too. Don’t isolate yourself.Reach out to friends, family, or support groups who can provide a listening ear, a shoulder to lean on, and words of encouragement when you need them most.

This Too Shall Pass 

The intensity of your emotions may feel overwhelming at times, but it's important to remember that these feelings are temporary. Like waves crashing against the shore, they will eventually recede, leaving behind a sense of calm and clarity.  There are happy and peaceful times ahead - forge on. Allow yourself to consider what you want in this next chapter of your life.  In my experience, putting my attention on creating a future I was excited about was extremely helpful in not staying stuck in divorce funk. 

You Will Grow Stronger 

Adversity has a way of revealing our inner strength and resilience. Use this experience as an opportunity for personal growth and self-discovery. As you navigate through the challenges of divorce, you will discover strengths within yourself that you never knew existed.  Don’t dismiss the smallest and largest of personal victories.  I made a practice of writing down three “wins” every night as a nightly ritual. This small action allowed me to recognize how strong I was in the hardest days of my life.  Give yourself credit for what you are doing instead of fixating on all the things that still feel impossible.

Focus on Self-Love

Divorce can shake your sense of self-worth and confidence, therefore it's essential to prioritize self-love and self-care during this time. Somehow, I intuitively knew that I needed to double down on what I termed “Radical Self Care”. This meant I fed myself deeply nurturing food.  I tried to consume only positive and uplifting tv shows and social media. I was very selective about who I spent time with so that I wasn’t even more emotionally drained.  I carved out time to meditate, journal and spend time in nature. It may feel like you don’t have time or energy to upgrade your self care - and it will be your saving grace through this process and in the early days of healing afterward. Treat yourself with kindness, compassion, and forgiveness, and remember that you are deserving of love and happiness.

Embrace Your Independence

This one may, or may not, sound counterintuitive - you are upset about the divorce because you are used to being a couple.  Independence can sound daunting.  It did to me.  And then…I found myself enjoying coming home to a peaceful house, saying yes to social invitations without checking with my partner, painting my bedroom without consulting anyone, traveling with friends, trying new things and returning to activities I gave up for my relationship.  Independence started really growing on me.  My suggestion to you, use this time to rediscover who you are as an individual, pursue your passions and interests, and chart a new course for your future on your own terms.

Learn from the Experience

Don’t let this challenge go without gleaning the lessons it will provide. Every experience, no matter how painful, offers valuable lessons for growth and self-improvement. Take the time to reflect on what you have learned from your marriage and divorce, and use these insights and newly won life tools to manage future challenges that pop up.  Because for sure they will! Life keeps us on our toes - use this experience to be prepared.

Believe in Yourself 

Above all, believe in yourself and your ability to overcome this challenge. Trust in your resilience, lean on your support system, and know that you have everything you need within you to not only survive but thrive in the aftermath of divorce.

While divorce may feel like the end of the world, it is, in fact, the beginning of a new chapter in your life. It may not be a chapter that you saw coming or that you wanted for yourself but here you are.  The first step to reduce your suffering is to radically accept the reality of what is happening in your life right now.  And move forward from there. Embrace this opportunity for growth, self-discovery, and empowerment, and know that you have the strength and resilience to emerge from this experience stronger, wiser, and more resilient than ever before. You are capable of weathering this storm and emerging victorious on the other side.

Additional Resources

Therapy and Counseling: Consider seeking the guidance of a therapist or counselor who specializes in divorce recovery. They can provide you with valuable tools and coping strategies to navigate through this challenging time and support you in processing your emotions. Websites like Psychology Today can help you find therapists in your area.

Support Groups: Joining a support group for individuals going through divorce can provide you with a sense of community, understanding, and solidarity. Consider joining the ReBranding Divorce private Facebook community dedicated to divorced women with the shared goal of moving and living their healthiest life.

Legal Assistance: If you're in need of legal guidance and support during the divorce process, consider reaching out to a reputable family law attorney. Websites like the American Bar Association can with general divorce information and help you find qualified attorneys in your area.

Self-Care Practices: Incorporating self-care practices into your daily routine is essential for maintaining your physical and emotional well-being during divorce. Websites like Headspace offer guided meditations and mindfulness exercises to help you manage stress and promote relaxation. We are huge fans of Tapping and incorporate it into most of our online and live courses.  Tapping is part of my personal daily self care routine. To learn more about Tapping and jump into your own practice, download the Tapping Solution app and experience it for yourself. 

Remember, reaching out for support and guidance is a sign of strength, not weakness. Don't hesitate to utilize any and all resources to help you navigate through this challenging time and emerge stronger, wiser, and more resilient than ever before.